Dinner for Schmucks (2010)

Besties 

People Who Matter:  

Steve Carell:  Barry

Paul Rudd:  Tim

Zach Galifianakis:   Therman

Stephanie Szostak:  Julie

There is such an abundance of funny, talented, amazing actors in this movie that it just has to be great, right?  I don't see how it's possible that all of these people get together and produce anything short of amazing.  However, Dinner for Schmucks is not amazing or great.  In fact, I'm more than a little disappointed right now.  I haven't felt this upset after a movie since I watched the abortion that was Saw 3D.  

Despite one of the weirdest opening credits I've seen in a long time, Dinner for Schmucks starts strong, showing Tim (Rudd) striving for a new opening at his corporate financial job.  He feels he needs to move up that corporate ladder to impress his girlfriend (who he keeps proposing to... and keeps getting rejected) that he doesn't feel he is good enough for.  Of course, his boss has an idea that will show he is worthy of that new corner office:  a dinner party in which he has to bring an idiot so he and his corporate friends can mock them.  Because seriously, the only way we can judge someone's job performance is by a downright cruel dinner in which we pit people against each other in a contest of crazies?  That's far-fetched even by my standards, but whatever, I'll bite. 

The snag in the plan comes from Tim's girlfriend, Julie (Szostak), who is rightly horrified by this obviously terrible idea.  She tells him to skip the dinner, which he is prepared to do (suggesting that maybe he isn't a soulless corporate whack job after all) until he meets the dead-mice-toting Barry (Carell).  This guy can't be real, right?  Despite the fact that he almost got hit by a car to save a mouse that was already dead, he carries around artful scenes featuring more mice... in clothes.  Obviously, Tim can't pass up this golden opportunity to impress his boss, so he invites Barry to the dinner.  

 Oh, dear Mouse Jesus

This doesn't sit well with Julie, who then leaves Tim.  And this begins the movie's "funny" bits, which consist almost entirely of Barry ruining every aspect of Tim's life.  I don't know if I was supposed to feel sorry for Barry or Tim during these parts, but they both came out looking like jackasses.  Barry is too clueless for me to even imagine that he is a real person.  No one on this planet is that naive, that silly, or that... well... dumb.  Tim lied to his girlfriend which started his downward spiral, and then continues to rage on like an asshole, so I can't feel sorry for him.  Because honestly, if getting that promotion is worth more to you than the supposed reason you want it, you need to get your priorities in order.  

While Barry and Tim are running around the city sharing whacky shenanigans, Julie is being courted by one of her most talented artists,  Kieran (Jemaine Clement).  The man is a sex machine and doesn't make it any secret he wants to involve Julie in his latest "art process," which is basically where he makes erotica out of animals... it's very strange. 

see what I'm talking about, here?

While on the journey leading up to the actual dinner, we meet Barry's biggest rival, his boss Therman (Galifianakis).  We learn that Therman is also a very "extraordinary" individual, and it's not hard to guess that he will be making an appearance at the dinner as well.  Therman is a "mind-controller," and for just $14.99, you can learn his secrets.  Therman stole Barry's wife back in the day, and seems hell-bent on making sure Barry knows that in every single interaction they have together.  As interesting (and hilarious) as it sounds, it isn't.  It is just as boring and just as uninteresting as every other aspect in this plot.  

When Barry starts to open up to Tim about the details surrounding his divorce (including, but not limited to, him hiding under the bed while his wife and boss went at it above him... which seems to be a recurring theme in his life, see the credits), it was sad, but it didn't make me care about his character any more.   Barry is quirky, but not in the cute, fun way.  He's annoying, like the fly in the room when you're trying to go to sleep. 

Tim is a selfish douchebag that I could never see myself rooting for.  He doesn't deserve Julie.  He doesn't deserve anyone.  The relationship is barely believable to begin with, then it's over, and then he spends the entire movie trying to "win her back," even though he continuously puts his career ahead of her.  Not to mention, continuously allows Barry to destroy everything. 

The actual dinner comes and goes much faster than expected.  With this huge buildup to it, I was thinking that maybe it would be the saving grace of the whole movie and would just dazzle me with humor and leave me wondering why I didn't love this movie from the get-go.  It didn't.  Again, it's just downright mean.  On top of Barry and Therman, there's a blind sword-fighter, a woman who can speak to dead animals, a ventriloquist with a very well-endowed puppet of a wife, and a dude with a freaky relationship with a bird.  I can tell they tried to make these people cute and fun so that we're laughing with them and not at them, but I obviously missed that memo.  

There were a few chuckles, but they were much too few and much too far apart for this to be a comedy.  Especially considering three of my favorite funny guys (Rudd, Carell, and Galifianakis) worked  together, it's really hard for me to admit that this movie just isn't good.  It isn't funny, it doesn't really drive home any points (except you can be an asshole and still keep your girlfriend and your wacky best friend... and that's not really the most positive message to be sending), and overall failed miserably.  It hurts me to say this, but...  

4 out of 10